Don't fuck the Company

I have ever had a relationship with a work colleague

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****la Man
44 Posts
Thread creator 
Don't fuck the Company
It's been a while since I posted here, and I though I might share / ask a question. But first let me describe my experience in short.

I have been dealing with some emotional issues the last couple of years after my divorce, and a couple of months ago finally got to a point where I was willing to try again... As luck would have it, the moment I turned my searchlight on, the first woman it lit up was a work colleague...

Now she has been working with me for more than a year, but all of a sudden we both noticed that we where strongly attracted to each other, and could hardly contain ourselves. Even though we both knew that this was a mistake, we tumbled into each other, not once, but repetitively. To worsen the matter, she has a relationship, and as soon as he found out, playtime was over.

Now a couple of months down the road, she has resigned...

So I was wondering, has anybody here ever had a relationship with someone at work, without it getting weird. I know the general unspoken law of
"Don't fuck the company, cause the company will fuck you"

but maybe this logic is a bit out of date, we are in the 21st century after all.

Anybody care to share some experience, a modern experience that is. Anything older than 10 years is old...
****ana Woman
34 Posts
Im pissed off to read that she had resigned. It is the reason why I would never do it, while somehow only women pay the consequences.
*****ven Woman
7,284 Posts
I can't choose any of your options. I met a love of my life at work. Together over 17 years. Just Fucking .... happened too. More than once. Boss, co-worker ... even employee. Did I intend that? No. Did I know it wasn't the best idea? Yes. Did I do it anyways? Yes, because I gave into the temptations and that's just how I live my life. Such "spare of the moment" encounters were never intended to "last" ... they were also never intended to happen. Were there consequences because of it? Sure. Will I do it again? Probably.

P.S.: I never gained anything by doing it ... by the way. And never would I use sex as a way to gain anything. The opposite was the case for the most part.
****la Man
44 Posts
Thread creator 
Quote from ********8305:
...somehow only women pay the consequences.
I wouldn't generalize that much, as I have seen many examples where
both left,
some examples where both stayed
and even some where they got married in the end...

It really hurts, and will never ever do this again, it really does not work, plus I feel like shit right now, and this does not really help my in any way emotionally, needless to say that I lost a great colleague, and a friend.

So I can just say lesson learnt, the hard way.
I guess I am back to square one.
the tall and weird old solo guy in the club... *wolf*

The thing that gets me the most, is that:
The Career you, often make friends with colleagues, because you spend so much time together, but a relationship is not allowed.
The Private you, seldom make friends, because you have too little time, but a relationship is expected.

That's some really fucked up logic man.
The system is broken, or the creator has a really sick sense of humor.

Tip from me:
don't immigrate to another country without friends, cause then your fucked, and it has nothing to do with the Company.
*****Guy Man
31 Posts
"Never dip your pen in company ink".... A little saying I learned from a few acquaintances and I stick to it.... I know it's generalisation, but unless both are willing to accept consequences, I would advise against it. However, like @*****ven, sometimes you have to just live life without barriers.... One just has to be good at knowing what barriers to stay inside and which ones to break. Temporary flings and affairs I could understand at work (probably even condone), but romantic extended relationships, while fun and happy at the start can also cause alot of pain if things don't work out.
********Kink Man
16 Posts
My boss is hitting on me since few months now. Very subtle but i got the message more than once. She is older than me, have kids, a good situation, but i'm not sure it's a good idea. But in the same time i got a lot of admiration for her.
********icus Man
170 Posts
I mis the option: "I wanted to *zwinker* "
*****ven Woman
7,284 Posts
@****la

Of course I don't know the details, but the fact, that she seems to have been in a monogamously committed relationship and cheated on that partner may have been the bigger (or at least a very big) issue here.

I am not naive, but if two people really want to make something work, the almost always find a way to do so. The resigning might have happened anyways but not necessarily the ending of your relationship. That's from my point of view attributed to the fact that she chose him over you. Sorry bud.
*******grl Woman
14 Posts
I have fucked a lot of co-workers in my life and always made sure things ended on good terms, well almost always. There was 1 that ended badly but we have reconnected and even met up a few times down the road. He is a very good friend. However, I try to keep it outside my work place for peace of mind.
I am of the opinion that its all good as long as everyone is open and honest why not enjoy. Once I even fucked 3 of my co-workers in a 24hr period (I was young and going through divorce).
****BG Man
61 Posts
I think thats a recipe for disaster *ggg*
*****ven Woman
7,284 Posts
Quote from ****BG:
I think thats a recipe for disaster :D

People don't openly share their experience here to be judged (or shamed or bullied).
****BG Man
61 Posts
Quote from *****ven:
Quote from ****BG:
I think thats a recipe for disaster :D

People don't openly share their experience here to be judged (or shamed or bullied).


Couldnt agree more
*********life Woman
198 Posts
I would with someone from another team that I was not working for or working for me.

I would not with someone on my team. Too close of a situation.
*****ven Woman
7,284 Posts
Quote from ****BG:
Quote from *****ven:
Quote from ****BG:
I think thats a recipe for disaster :D

People don't openly share their experience here to be judged (or shamed or bullied).


Couldnt agree more

Do you understand, what "judgement" means? Telling someone, what they do is a recipe for desaster ... is exactly that. A JUDGEMENT.
*******ilk Man
9 Posts
I actually tried it a few times with some colleagues in my work places. Whenever I wear fit trousers, since there is not enough place to hide my thing, it is slightly visible because of its even flaccid size. Once I caught our accountant lady looking there and making a sudden shocked look turning her head and starting a quick kinky smile, with whom normally we had good relations (in friend zone).

I once invited her to dinner at the restaurant next to our office after work on Friday. Since she had a few free hours, she accepted it. We started chatting. And after some time, she suddenly told me with a funny humor that I should stop wearing fit trousers. There is no enough place there. I asked, "what do you mean?". She told with a smile that "I think you know what I mean exactly, check the middle of your trousers, pal." I was a bit shocked and also aroused, since I used to fantasize about her many times during my work there. She was a decent looking but very attractive lady in her early 40s." I tried to flirt with her. We met for a date a few times, but it didn't work. And no, we didn't have sex. lol.
********Kink Man
16 Posts
Damn.... I was hoping for an happy ending for you
****BG Man
61 Posts
Quote from *****ven:
Quote from ****BG:
Quote from *****ven:
Quote from ****BG:
I think thats a recipe for disaster :D

People don't openly share their experience here to be judged (or shamed or bullied).


Couldnt agree more

Do you understand, what "judgement" means? Telling someone, what they do is a recipe for desaster ... is exactly that. A JUDGEMENT.


Didnt even come to mind that you were referring to my comment *lol*
I have no idea how you see that as "judgmental"

It is an opinion, justified by the fact that most relationships within the workplace usually end badly.
**C Man
12,058 Posts
...everyone says that having a sexual thing on the working place is bad. So I wonder why so many relationships and even marriages started in the same company...?
*****ier Man
983 Posts
Was tempted to a couple o' times and very close doing it but finally never did. Happened with a close friend outside of work and ruined the friendship.
So based on my personal experience, I'd change the saying to:
"Don't fuck the company or your long time best friend, cause life might fuck you"
*****anU Man
151 Posts
I wouldn't want to get into intimate relationships or anything like that with colleagues at work, because in most cases that ends up really badly. Even in a relationship you need distance, otherwise you can be almost sure that sooner or later there will be a conflict. This conflict then also affects the work and is also carried out there. In addition, there are usually rumors that have a negative impact on the job. Depending on the size of the company, you see each other every day or several times a week, and you still have to work together afterwards.
**********i_c_k Man
21 Posts
This comes handy, I am attracted by someone from work, not my team but we interact.... Seeing the results of this pool I guess i'll keep it professional. *danke*
**********ary69 Woman
549 Posts
NEVER !
Businesses and private life are strictly separated.

But there where some couples found each other in our department... and married for 15 and 25 years for example.

But I keep my hands off from work colleagues.
********ires Woman
1 Posts
Nice read guys... thanks for the contributions
Quote from ********8305:
Im pissed off to read that she had resigned. It is the reason why I would never do it, while somehow only women pay the consequences.
That's a unfortunate fact of the way the world is. I hate that about society....
Quote from *******grl:
I have fucked a lot of co-workers in my life and always made sure things ended on good terms, well almost always. There was 1 that ended badly but we have reconnected and even met up a few times down the road. He is a very good friend. However, I try to keep it outside my work place for peace of mind.
I am of the opinion that its all good as long as everyone is open and honest why not enjoy. Once I even fucked 3 of my co-workers in a 24hr period (I was young and going through divorce).
And you probably needed that right then and there! Good for you luv!
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