Is it something wrong to be sex addict?

An open relationship implies that both parties are aware that the other is seeking a sexual or some type of relationship outside of the marriage. You stated here that your wife does not know so you might want to consider changing your relationship status to reflect reality.

I’m not a fan of being in a relationship where I have to lie to my spouse. Perhaps that’s why I have two failed marriages.

I’ve dated people from here who have a spouse and are lying in the past and I am not a fan.

I’m not sure people in relationships are sexually ever on the same level as it seems to be a moving target.

I would advocate honesty as well.
The less true you are to your self + your real needs, wishes, dreams and desires (this side of the law, of course), the less your life is actually yours.

Becoming you is a life-long task that involves a lot of trial & error; but I don't see anything promising more potential reward/s than going for authenticity. It will allow you to identify your actual match/es increasingly better. You will know your true tribe once you found it. It will feel like coming home, at long last.

/hth /2cents

It's simple..you have 3 choices only. 1. Discuss it with her on what more you can BOTH do to spice things up. After that you are back to the core 2 choices . 2. Accept it or 3. Change it. There is no 4th choice. But remember a relationship is about what you wish to give to rhe other; not what one person demands of the other. That's called gaslighting and emotional blackmail thus you accept what's possible, or you make changes. Remember , you cannot change someone , and shouldnt ever try to. It doesn't work anyway.

the less you lie
to yourself or others
the more fair you are
to yourself and others.

it would be completely wrong to cheat and I think as an adult you know this. The fact is that you haven't accepted it at all, and I am fairly sure she has no idea that you are on here. Children make the mechanics of decision making all the more difficult but depending on the home environment you could run the risk of losing them completely if you are caught with your pants down . Accepting the situation is not jumping sneakily on joyclub seeking validation or the hope someone might read your message and think 'ill help this guy with his 'addiction'. Trust me, I've been in a relationship which was not balanced sexually and to 'accept ' that means you live with your decision, embrace it and never think of cheating or fishing online. That's acceptance. I couldn't accept my imbalance and did something about it. It might be tough but what is worse ? Cheating and bringing God knows what back with you. Its emotionally and intellectually unfair. OK. That's my tuppence worth.

If you think that discussing your sexual needs/desires with your partner will bring more problems than a solution. Cheating could as well bring the solution! Cheating without getting caught is healthy for you under your present circumstances.. Remember, life is very short, and you are not on excursion in this world

...but if he gets caught, this could end up rather unhealthy....

Communication,

This is key!
Always explain to your partner the issues you have ask her for her fantacy's, You assume she has an opposite view try to find out if that's really true. Also have you considered you are not pleasing her enough? IF the sex drive used to be there it's not suddenly gone. People say woman have less sexualy appitite this is imho not true but usually us men not thinking of her needs or she not communicating her needs properly. One thing is true to woman can go without sex easier.

After 10 years I have come to one core conclusion, people do not communicate in relations those that do and I mean 110% communication usually are the only that survive.

Cheating, not talking to her, or just accepting it. These are no options the feeling wil fester and fester and cheaters always get caught so all of these end at the same path. Meaning the relation is already lost.

"addiction" ?

You have desired. An addiction is something you can't control. As humans, we are all "addicted" so sex - it is something we desire. That's just built in. Real sex addicts have problems similar to alcoholics or drug addicts, from what you write you're far away from that.

So no panic. You're fine. You just want something you don't get at this time. That's a normal condition, too. We all want things we don't have. The question is if you are getting more than you miss out on. If you relation is otherwise great, this one thing shouldn't ruin it. If it's just one of many things you miss, this could be a sign of that.

Interesting user name, what does it mean? चूड़ाकड