When sexting, you send hot messages via smartphone or let the keyboard glow on the computer. Whether at home, in the office or on the road - a lustful message will get your significant other's head spinning. Read up on the tips and tricks for seductive sext messages in everyday life here.
What is sexting?
You send the eggplant emoji to your lover - the stuck-out tongue comes back. Receiving and sending erotic or ambiguous innuendos sets the mood. Provided that all parties involved want it! Therefore, right at the beginning the note that the unsolicited sending of “dick pics” is not only assaultive, but punishable by law. If consent is given, sexting offers almost endless possibilities; a wide range of words, metaphors and ambiguities.
Disclaimer: The unsolicited sending of dick pics is a crime. Some lost causes unfortunately do not care, but you have the option in JOYclub to set a dick pic filter. This blurrs photos and you decide whether you want to see them or not.
And to all people with penis: If dick pic, then ask beforehand - and do your partner a favour by turning on a light.
In principle, sexting is simple and you can get started right away without any in-depth know-how or accessories. All you need is a smartphone or any messenger, a little creativity and a partner for whom your spicy messages are intended. In addition to smartphone messengers, you can of course also write classic text messages or use your computer.
If you're in a long-term relationship, sexting can be a breath of fresh air in your everyday and sex life. It's best to approach it carefully to see if your partner is open to sexting and is as keen on a little virtual smut as you are. You could take a first step when the other person is out and about. Caption a hot selfie with a meaningful "Looking forward to later!” and see how they react.
It's a good idea to be open about your preferences in general; that way you can express your desire for sexting directly. If you both feel like it, you can give your partner a clear ball game with messages like "I'd like to spank your naked ass right now.”
Especially in a long-distance relationship, sexting can sweeten the time you spend apart. Maybe replace the simple "Good morning!" with a message describing to your partner what you would do to him or her right now if you’d woken up together. "I'd like to kiss your lips awake right now - all four of them!" and the morning becomes all the more exciting.
Regardless of whether you're still in the very beginning stages of your flirting and can't really judge your counterpart yet, you should always remain authentic when sexting. The words you use in your messages should ideally match your natural expression. Think about whether you would also say them to the person’s face or not.
If your sexy message sounds rather corny and like something out of a bad movie, the desire can quickly evaporate. You can prevent this by giving the messages a personal touch. To do this, it's best to put yourself back in a situation in which the two of you were intimate. Mention details that only the two of you can know. The most important thing is to get both of your imaginations rolling.
What is the thrill of sexting?
The flexibility that sexting brings to everyday life! Sexy messages can be enjoyed almost anywhere and at almost any time of day via messenger. It doesn't matter if you're in a slow meeting, on a coffee break, on public transportation in rush hour traffic, or just at home on your couch in the evening. Sexting makes it possible to turn any moment, no matter how deadlocked, into an erotic adventure that will make sparks fly for both of you.
What can you say while sexting?
The basic rule here is: whatever you like is allowed! Sexting is a very personal and intimate matter between you and your partner. Therefore, you determine your own boundaries and adapt your choice of words to your relationship construct. In committed partnerships, everyday life can be loosened up with sexting, in long-distance relationships the longing can be taken to the extreme and in still fresh flirtations, you can find out a lot about the person’s desires. And these are just a few examples.
The placeholder "..." is an ideal tool to give free rein to one's own imagination when sexting. Some, for example, prefer innuendos or hints to straight-forward messages. You can also underline your message with a winking emoji. Be curious how your partner interprets your words.
It is important that you can get involved with each other spontaneously. When just texting, misunderstandings can occur, but if both partners can laugh about it, that doesn't have to be the end of the erotic exchange.
Of course, sexting can also get more rampant and uninhibited. Depending on the intensity of your relationship, you may also ask your partner to perform specific sexual acts via chat. Dirty talk is ideal for getting each other hot from a distance and possibly climaxing together via chat. It's up to you whether you want to review a particularly erotic experience together or play out your sexual desires virtually.
6 tips and tricks for sexting
- Stay authentic! Describe what you would do to your partner if you were together right now - what parts of their body you would touch and in what way. Get creative and involve all your senses. What do you want to taste or smell?
- Make confessions. The revelation of secret fantasies brings pleasurable intimacy into your words. Your counterpart will be quite turned on by you showing yourself so openly. This can create closeness even from a distance.
- Challenge your counterpart playfully or set them sexy tasks. Pay attention to boundaries even in written dirty talk. Only be as "disrespectful" as both of you are fine with.
- Dare to leave gaps! This leaves room for fantasy... Mix clear statements and ambiguous remarks. For example, describe how your fingers start at the collarbone and move lower and lower, and then...
- Send sexy photos in addition to messages. A classic is the selfie in bed, but it might give you and your partner that extra kick to take pictures in unusual places.
- Stay spontaneous. Don't lay out a script, get involved with each other's messages. Sexting is erotic and, at its best, always a little playful. Laugh at misunderstandings. Humour is sexy!
Sexting and BDSM
A popular way of playing BDSM is giving orders from afar by sexting. With imposed rules and tasks via cell phone, the dom can sweeten their sub’s day from afar. At the end of such a task, there is often the request for a proof picture. This way, sexting makes it possible to live out BDSM dynamics in everyday life as well.
Risks and side effects
On a physical basis, sexting is one of the safest sexual practices. Physically, no one is harmed in the process. If you're walking through the streets while sexting, don't forget that red lights exist. And don't text and sext while driving! Then sexting remains completely harmless for your body.
If you can't yet fully assess your counterpart, you should be sensitive about sending naked pictures and sexual fantasies. Unfortunately, it frequently happens that erotic chats are abused to get pornographic content. If this is published arbitrarily on the Internet, it is actually a criminal offense. Nevertheless, the consequences are usually borne by the victims. If in doubt, it is advisable to leave your face out of nude pictures for the time being.
However, if you have a sexting partner you trust, you can fully enjoy sexting until your fingers get sore. To quote US comedian Bo Burnham: "Sexting - It isn't sex, it's the next best thing".
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